This is sort of a PSA for clients and therapists alike. Therapy is not the answer to our problems of relationships, depression, grief/loss, addiction, taking food from others, communication, our sense of broken-ness/low self worth/shame, loneliness, etc. Therapy isn’t just a way of being either. It’s probably a way of being that solves these problems, and can prevent many in the future as a result. The only exception, if seen in a particular light, might be around issues of safety that require immediate intervention.
Therapy should be a space where we work through the feelings we’re carrying with us that prevent us from coming to these answers on our own. It’s an activity that should prompt us to be without our defenses and distractions as much as is possible, with a guide that has done enough of their own work that we can be taught how to live gracefully with these feelings, let go of them/transform them, and provide us principles and ideas that will help us not make some of these mistakes in the future.
We certainly should be giving direction about how to handle some circumstances, communicate more effectively, learning parenting and relationship skills, symptom management, relapse prevention and etc. There should be an organized body of material to assist with these things. They will all be rendered useless though, in absence of a principled way of operating, and or in the presence of enough emotional intensity that the tools cannot be used or we cannot see “answers” clearly or the simple consequences of not having these feelings gracefully end up exacerbating problems.
So, a suggestion. Learn some survival skills that lend themselves to our ability to get some new ways of operating. Have enough support from family, friends, and professionals that will enable surviving the process. Deal with the feelings that come up, then set about “solving” things.